10. Squirrel Underpants

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Even if one were inclined to purchase a ridiculously useless item like this, wouldn’t it involve the potentially hazardous task of capturing a live wild squirrel? The product description indicates that this item can help your local squirrel population embrace modesty and spare children’s eyes the unspeakable horrors of squirrel wieners. Having seen more than our fair share of squirrels, it’s obvious even to the casual observer that the squirrel’s naughty bits are too tiny and well-covered by the critter’s fur to be a threat to the innocence of a child. We realize this is a gag item and our analysis is tongue-in-cheek, but this really is a weird and rather stupid item. They claim 20 have been sold and there are only 6 remaining at $7.39 a pop, so don’t delay. What we really want is the names and addresses of the people who have already purchased these things since we could probably pick something out of the trash they’d be willing to pay us for.