The Exploding Whale of Florence: Oregon’s Most Explosive Blunder of 1970
— March 16, 2026On a chilly November morning in 1970, a 45-foot, eight-ton sperm whale washed ashore…
It turns out that herring actually consider farting a socially acceptable, and even useful practice! Scientists were so baffled by this behavior that an international study was commissioned! Employing experts from both Great Britain and Canada, the intrepid researchers were determined to solve the mystery of fish flatulence. They had long wondered why herring produced strange sounds which were accompanied by a stream of bubbles rising to the surface of the water. Both Atlantic and Pacific herring were studied, and it was determined that the herring were indeed producing these sounds with their anus. They believe that the fish use the sounds to help locate each other and make it easier for them to gather into protective shoals to overnight. Although the research, dubbed “Fast Repetitive Tick” or FRT (yes, we’re serious) didn’t mention it, we presume that gaseous emissions of this variety do not travel the same way through water as they do through air. Or, perhaps that herring farts simply do not smell. It’s also possible that herring just have a lousy sense of smell or no sense of smell at all. Perhaps the next study can set out to determine how any species could respond to the sound of farts as a signal to draw nearer to each other.